Scotland star Ross McCormack, 23, drove off in his £40,000 Range Rover Sport after hitting metal railings.
But cops found his R44 MCC plate in the road and quickly identified the £8,000-a-week Cardiff City striker, who wears the number 44 shirt for the Championship side.
He was nearly twice the limit when breathalysed at his flat nearby.
Cardiff JPs heard McCormack — capped four times by Scotland — had been celebrating a league win before the 3.44am crash.
Mark Hathan, defending, said McCormack had been “foolish and idiotic”.
The player, of Cardiff Bay, admitted drink-driving. He was banned for 17 months and ordered to pay £2,600.